85.第八十四章
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“参见陛下。”徐意山跪在男人脚边，低着头道。
“顾御侍，你以为你自残的事瞒得了朕吗？”洛帝用两根手指挑起他的下巴，带着一丝愠怒道：“你是想用这种方法来重新让朕关注你，可怜你吗？”
“不是，”他轻轻地摇头，“臣下只是太想念皇上了。可是皇上又不肯给臣下机会见您。臣下想向您解释清楚一切，只好出此下策。”
“你有什么好解释的？”男人皱起了修剪的十分整齐的墨眉，“你今日若是说不出个所以然来，朕就将你扔进大牢里去，让你尝尝朕的刑部的厉害。”
徐意山将脑海中不好的回忆尽数摒去，平静道：“我今天过来就是要向您坦白一切的。只有让您明白我真正的心意，您才能重新看待我。陛下，我不是您的俘虏，我像宫里的其他人一样渴望得到您的心，哪怕只有千万分之一。”
燕安洛倒是有些意外他会这样说。他一甩龙袍，坐到了桌边，充满兴味地道：“那你就从你进宫那天开始说起，告诉朕你都亲手做过，或者参与过哪些不可告人的事情。”
徐意山乖乖点头，“之前确实是我撒谎骗了陛下，同我勾结的不是宫人所的白公公，而是福公公。我为了包庇曾经帮过我的福公公，才没有说出实情。当时，福公公收了我的银子，就让我服下了假的束意丸。”
洛帝似早已了然一切，嗤笑道：“你总算是说了实话。胆敢欺骗朕，你可知该当何罪？”
徐意山赶紧道：“求陛下请先听臣下说完，到时候要杀要剐，悉听尊便。”
洛帝不耐烦道：“快说。”
徐意山咬咬牙，低声道：“在我没有服下束意丸的当天，我的舍友白韵无意中发现了我没有服下束意丸的秘密，我为了保住自己……就杀了他。”
洛帝冷笑道：“正是此事让你在朕心中留下了心狠手辣的印象。一个才进宫的小宫人，就能狠下心神不知鬼不觉地杀害同舍之人，你很是让朕意外啊。”
“而我因为杀害白韵这事，”徐意山停顿了一下，才接着道：“还有在戚太皇侍的千岁宴上出头帮慕清迤说话的表现，得到了戚太皇侍的赏识，成了他的棋子。”
“早点这么诚实不就好了？朕老早就知道了这些事情，就是想看看你什么时候招。”
徐意山见洛帝面上露出了少许满意的神色，偷偷在心底冷笑了一声。他继续道：“后来，我因为在献给司秋贵侍的生辰礼物中下毒被您打入了冷宫……其实那事是司秋和已经去世的吴御侍联合起来陷害我的，我什么都没做有做过。”说完，他用含着湿意的眼睛看着男人，却并不是乞怜的神色，而是带着一丝不卑不亢的倔强。
洛帝不由得盯着他的眼睛，这双眼睛不大不小，说不上好看。他此时竟觉着这双眼睛是会说话的，似乎在无声地谴责着自己。他轻咳一声，摸着眼前稍嫌圆润的脸颊，将手指移到那道新的伤疤上，说：“朕知道冤枉了你，不过后来朕不是将你从冷宫里救出来了吗？”
“嗯。”徐意山认真点头道：“所以陛下你对我很好。就算您一直都不信我，我也没有怪过你。”
洛帝微抬起半边的嘴角，在手上加了些力：“你从没怪过朕？那为何头几次朕临幸你的时候，你是都一副要死要活的样子，就跟块棺材板一样？”
徐意山麻木地感受着他按在自己伤疤上的手指，睁眼说瞎话：“那是因为我以为陛下只是想用那种方式向我逼供，是在惩罚我。若是两情相悦的结合，臣下又怎么会拒绝呢？”
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