七 吊死鬼
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班主一看，这唱戏指定是唱不了啦。一上台，这小脑袋顶着凤冠，咣咣铛铛的唱贵妃醉酒？非笑场不可，戏台都得让戏迷拆了！
没法在戏班混饭吃，父母老家儿又都亡故了，小脑袋只能在戏班跟包打杂。这小子经常去三不管闲逛，后来认识了芦庄子的豁了嘴，那货是拨门撬锁的臭贼，小脑袋跟他还能学好？光学手脚不干净了。
没多久小脑袋在戏班偷东西，让班主逮个正着，典身钱也不要了，直接把这小子赶出了戏班。一来二去小脑袋就成了三不管的狗烂儿，他人精手快，专干小偷小摸的勾当，但他这个小脑袋长得不好，实在太显眼，只要是他一露面，人家就都防着他，根本没法近前下手，这日子是一天比一天难混。
前些日子，小脑袋路过南马路一间扎纸铺，看见门口放了俩扎纸人。这小子可动了歪心思。他寻思着糊个白纸人脑袋，弄一把假头发，晚晌装成个小媳妇，找个地方用哭声勾引那个好色之徒，再打晕了抢钱。他身材瘦削，披上假发，背影还真勾人儿，但是不能把脑袋露出来，一看他那小脑袋还不当场露了馅。于是他就用纸糊个脑袋，套个假发戴在头上。
他想得挺好，可事与愿违，他自己身子单薄，气力也不够。有回想下手，结果遇上个五大三粗的汉子，他藏着棍子楞是没撕吧过人家，让人家好一顿揍，欠点连屎尿都给打出来。回家之后，他左思右想又动了别的心思。
他又糊了个纸脑袋，这回不糊五官，只弄出一张大嘴，还给大嘴里粘上个二尺长的假舌头，不装女人，直接装女鬼。甭说，这招还真好使，连接劫了好几个人。
小脑袋和豁了嘴瞎混的时候，学了豁了嘴家传的本事——萤火流光法。这萤火流光法是前清飞贼传下来的手法，是一种用磷粉制成的粉笔，在墙上画个图，磷粉燃点低，一会儿自己个就着了，突突的冒气蓝火儿。以前飞贼就是用这手儿，把人引出屋子，再进屋偷盗。
豁了嘴祖上当过飞贼，会这门手法，小脑袋跟他学了些皮毛，就用来装鬼火儿。他找个岔路口，远远的看见有人来，就在一条岔路上画个骷髅，然后到另一条路上装小媳妇。来人若是胆小，看见远处鬼火，必然绕道而行，到时候他再用哭声勾引行人。只要人家一拾茬，他就用手抓着套在脑袋上的纸人头，猛地转过脸去，大晚晌儿看见这张没有五官吐着长舌的脸，还不当场被吓死过去。这时候他再上前浑身摸索，把昏倒这位口袋里的财物洗劫一空。
这家伙脑袋小，套上纸人头也和常人一般大小，突然拧转纸人头，也十分便捷。就这么着，他连着吓晕好几位，可其实也没得着多少钱财。至于吓死了人，勾人魂魄什么的，全是老百姓口耳相传的谣言而已。
韩大胆儿用脚扒拉几下小脑袋，看他缩在地上哼唧了两声，知道这家伙没死，就大声道：
“赶紧起来，别装死！要不我可往你身上崩啦！”
说着就作势原地跳起，伸脚往小脑袋身上踩。小脑袋反应倒快，一骨碌身爬起来就想跑，可刚才挨那一拳着实不轻，脑袋后面肿起一个大包，这时头昏眼花双脚一软，没跑两步，就扑通一下跪倒在地。
韩大胆儿道：
“往哪跪？我在这呢！这会儿认干老儿也没用了！”
小脑袋又要站起身逃跑，被韩大胆儿一把抓住，喀嚓一声先给他来一副“大手镯子”，把这小子铐上了。
韩大胆儿道：
“走吧！你这装鬼吓人，死好几口了，人命官司你就打了吧！”
小脑袋哭爹喊娘地叫苦：
“哎呦妈妈哎！我要知道是您了，再给我俩胆儿我也不敢呐！可冤死我了，哪有人命啊，我统共吓晕仨人，都是老色鬼惦着占便宜，一共就得了四块钱十来个大子儿，真没出人命……”
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