一个小甜饼

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一个小甜饼 > 团宠大佬四岁半 > 第583章 乱拳打死老师傅

第583章 乱拳打死老师傅

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宋瓷振振有词:

“你就有!否则这么简单的法子,你为什么纠结这么多年,愣是没想出来?你就是在偷懒!

你都宁愿大夏天成天穿着长袖长裤,把自己个儿捂出痱子来,也不肯打理一下这些毛毛,还说不是偷懒?

剃毛又不痛!”

宋淼瞳孔震颤,嘴巴开开合合,愣是挤不出一个字来。

总觉得妹妹说得有点问题,可又不知道哪里不对的样子。

难道真是她错了?她这些年都是在庸人自扰自寻烦恼?

宋瓷见震慑住了姐姐,得意地乘胜追击:

“姐你不要相信老辈人的老思想,什么女人家就得朴素节俭,只要能干农活能生儿子就好,打扮得花枝招展的就是不安分,嫁不到好人家。

这话就是糊弄人的。

爱美之心人皆有之,能娶个漂亮媳妇,谁乐意娶个丑八怪回家,再生个歪瓜裂枣的孙子,带出去不嫌丢人啊?”

宋瓷嘴快地提起后头这茬,心里咯噔一下,飞快地瞥了她姐一眼,生怕戳中人家痛处,造成逆反效果。

好在宋淼还处于被连续攻击的后续效果当中,持续眩晕思考无能,没及时反应过来,反倒叫宋瓷给躲过一劫。

宋瓷吐下舌头,赶忙加快语速补救:

“姐你扪心自问,你看见电影明星那样的俊男美女,愿不愿意多瞅两眼?愿不愿意嫁个那样好看的伴侣?愿不愿意有个那样光鲜亮丽的儿媳妇女婿?

肯定愿意的是吧?这就对了!这才是大多数人真正的想法。

那些不许女同志打扮的,其实都是为挣不来钱,供不起自家媳妇闺女打扮的无能之辈,维持自家贫穷窘迫的日子,绞尽脑汁想出来的开源节流的笨办法罢了,错的从来不是爱美的女同志。”

宋淼眼神有些发直,有点想跟着振臂喊口号的冲动。

可她不是在进行姐妹间的亲密聊天吗,怎么就弄成这样热血沸腾义愤填膺了?

宋瓷不管她,继续滔滔不绝:

“厘清了错误思想的根源问题,证明了女同志想要变美的正当性,接下来,就说说如何变美的问题。

不要相信清水出芙蓉,天然去雕饰的假话,那种人见人爱花见花开,360度无死角的天然美人,基本不存在。

谁身上还没点瑕疵了?据传古代四大美人身上还都有缺陷呢。

像是杨玉环的体胖狐臭、西施的大脚、王昭君的削肩内八字腿、貂蝉耳垂特别小,随便拎出哪一个来说,都挺严重的。

与她们一比,区区体毛重一点,简直不算个事儿。

因为她们的缺陷想要遮掩起来,比剃毛费劲多了;可人家不还是勤勤恳恳孜孜不倦地收拾自己,将美名流传史册,甚至还成就了一番普通人难以达成的事业功劳?”

宋瓷苦口婆心,说得渴了,又喝了口水润喉,睨着宋淼惭愧的脸色,微微勾起唇角。

任你千条妙计,我有一定之规,乱拳打死老师傅,就问你怎么招架!

“这听起来说得远了,那咱再说近点,就说说你也认识的那些电影明星吧。

就那谁谁,她也有你这样的困扰,可能问题没你严重,但她职业特殊啊,被镜头一怼,整个人都胖十斤,啥缺点都放大十倍,何况是不那么光洁的小腿。

怎么办呢?刮呗。每天刮,连咯吱窝都得照顾到。

不然你想想,当女明星穿上华美的连衣裙,化上仙气儿的妆容,周围唯美的场景一摆,浪漫的配乐一放,对面年轻英俊的对象带着款款深情张开怀抱飞奔而来,一切全都恰到好处;

结果这会儿女主角一抬胳膊,好家伙,黑乎乎似莽张飞,情调全破坏了好吗?

一出恋人久别重逢的戏码,分分钟变味。

哎姐你别光顾着笑啊,人家很认真在说的。”

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